English as a Second Language Podcast www.eslpod.com ESL Podcast 1086 – Giving Bribes to Children for Good Behavior GLOSSARY incentive – something that motivates someone to something, especially money * Elementary school teachers sometimes use stars as an incentive for students to behave well in class reward – a gift given to recognize one’s actions or behavior and thank him or her for it * Ms Andrews says that seeing her students succeed later in life is all the reward she requires sparingly – with a very small amount of something; not a lot or often * If you use these jars of jam sparingly, they should last all winter to bribe – to pay someone money so that he or she will what one wants, something that he or she would not normally do, or something that is illegal or wrong * The contractors bribed the mayor to get the bridge construction project frazzled – very tired, worn out, and not able to think clearly * The phones were ringing all day long and the receptionists were frazzled power struggle – an interaction between two people who are trying to control the situation and show that they have more authority and power than the other person * The two vice-presidents are in a power struggle to become the company’s next president to backfire – to have the opposite effect to what was intended or planned; to the opposite of what something was supposed to * Ricky quit smoking to save money on cigarettes, but his plan backfired when he started spending even more on candy and other snacks to distract himself from smoking what’s in it for (one) – the advantage or benefit that someone will receive as a result of doing something * If I help you write your paper, what’s in it for me? Are you going to help me with my math homework? These materials are copyrighted by the Center for Educational Development (2015) Posting of these materials on another website or distributing them in any way is prohibited English as a Second Language Podcast www.eslpod.com ESL Podcast 1086 – Giving Bribes to Children for Good Behavior to up the ante – a phrase taken from the card game of poker, meaning to increase the stakes or increase the risks associated with doing something * The other stores are offering increasingly high discounts Are we going to up the ante or stop trying to compete? to fork over – to pay a large amount of money for something when one really doesn’t want to * Who would fork over that much money for such a small apartment? to put the fear of God in (someone) – to make someone feel afraid of one’s power while also respecting and admiring that person; to frighten someone * Being in the center of that tornado really put the fear of God in us to dare – to something that is very difficult or challenging, that is not socially acceptable, or that risks disapproval * When they were teenagers, they dared their classmates to steal small items from stores for fear of – because one is afraid of * Helena never eats sushi for fear of getting sick from eating raw fish to babysit – to take care of someone’s child as a way to make money * Yetti was 14 years old when she started babysitting the neighbor’s children to inspire – to create a feeling or desire in another person * The CEO’s speech inspired employees to work harder toward his vision for the company obedience – compliance with orders; agreement to follow other’s rules and recognize another’s authority * In the past, American men demanded obedience from their wives, but now, most men view marriage as a partnership desperate – wanting and needing something very badly, without any other options * We haven’t been profitable for the past eight months, so we’re desperate for some new customers! parenting – the act of raising one’s children * Parents often say that parenting is one of the most challenging things they’ve ever done, but that it is one of the most rewarding These materials are copyrighted by the Center for Educational Development (2015) Posting of these materials on another website or distributing them in any way is prohibited English as a Second Language Podcast www.eslpod.com ESL Podcast 1086 – Giving Bribes to Children for Good Behavior COMPREHENSION QUESTIONS What does Camille mean when she says, “Soon I’ll have to start forking over cash”? a) Soon she’ll have to start eating money b) Soon she’ll have to start looking for a better-paying job c) Soon she’ll have to start paying large amounts of money What does Aaron mean when he says, “My mother put the fear of God into us”? a) His mother raised them to be religious people b) His mother told them God would punish them if they didn’t behave c) His mother commanded their respect and fear so they wouldn’t misbehave WHAT ELSE DOES IT MEAN? reward The word “reward,” in this podcast, means a gift given to recognize one’s actions or behavior and thank him or her for it: “The top salesperson will receive a oneweek vacation in Mexico as a reward.” The phrase “to reap the rewards” means to get and enjoy the benefits or advantages resulting from something: “We worked hard to plant the garden in the spring, so that we’ll be able to reap the rewards of fresh fruits and vegetables in the late summer and fall.” Finally, the word “reward” can also mean money paid to thank someone for helping to solve a crime or find something that was lost: “The police are offering a reward to anyone who can provide information about the robbery.” Or, “The neighbors are offering a $100 reward to anyone who finds their missing dog.” dare In this podcast, the verb “to dare” means to something that is very difficult or challenging, that is not socially acceptable, or that risks disapproval: “I dare you to kiss the next girl you see.” The phrase “how dare you” shows shock and anger related to someone’s word or actions: “How dare you steal money from my wallet!” The phrase “don’t you dare” is used to warn someone not to something, because it will make one very angry: “Don’t you dare disobey me when I tell you to something!” Finally, in the game “truth or dare,” people take turns deciding whether they will truthfully answer another person’s question or accept the dare or challenge and what they’ve been dared to These materials are copyrighted by the Center for Educational Development (2015) Posting of these materials on another website or distributing them in any way is prohibited English as a Second Language Podcast www.eslpod.com ESL Podcast 1086 – Giving Bribes to Children for Good Behavior CULTURE NOTE Sharenting Parents are “proud” (with feelings of pleasure and satisfaction related to something one has worked hard to or create) of their children and often want to tell everyone about their children In the past, people at work might show a photograph or their child or “boast” (talk about how good something is) to a neighbor about how their child is doing at school But things have changed with the “rise” (increasing use) of the Internet and “social media” (websites that allow people to connect and share information, such as Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter) Parents are able to tell more people than ever before about “little Johnny’s” (a generic name for a young boy) “accomplishments” (the things that one has done through hard work) When parents “overshare” (share too much information), some people say they are “sharenting” (a “mash-up” (combination of two words) of “sharing” and “parenting”) Parents who “are guilty of” (have done something they shouldn’t have) sharenting share stories, pictures, and more about their children Sometimes they share things that nobody else even wants to know about Some people argue that sharenting is a “violation” (an instance of breaking a rule or law) of a child’s “right to privacy” (the ability to keep one’s information private and not share it) They note that the sharenting activities create a “digital footprint” (all the information that is available about someone on the Internet) about children before they can even type or use a computer Comprehension Questions Correct Answers: – c; – c These materials are copyrighted by the Center for Educational Development (2015) Posting of these materials on another website or distributing them in any way is prohibited English as a Second Language Podcast www.eslpod.com ESL Podcast 1086 – Giving Bribes to Children for Good Behavior COMPLETE TRANSCRIPT Welcome to English as a Second Language Podcast number 1,086 – Giving Bribes to Children for Good Behavior This is English as a Second Language Podcast episode 1,086 I’m your host, Dr Jeff McQuillan, coming to you from the Center for Educational Development in beautiful Los Angeles, California Go to our website at ESLPod.com Become a member of ESL Podcast Take a look at our ESL Podcast Store You could also like us on Facebook at facebook.com/eslpod Oh, yeah – we’re on Twitter too, at @eslpod This episode is a dialogue between Camille and Aaron about giving things to your children so that they will behave – so that they will not be like my neighbor’s children who are always yelling and screaming It’s crazy Anyway, let’s get started [start of dialogue] Camille: No, you can’t have a new bike if you get an A on the test You should study because you want to well in school We’ll talk about it when I get home tonight Kids! Aaron: What’s the matter? Camille: My kids won’t anything without an incentive I know it’s my own fault for offering rewards for good behavior, but now all they want to know is what they’ll get to what I ask Aaron: Rewards are okay if you use them sparingly, aren’t they? Camille: That’s the problem I feel like I have to bribe them to the simplest things I get home from work and I’m tired and frazzled I don’t want another power struggle, so I rely on bribes It’s backfired Aaron: How you mean? Camille: Now my kids won’t anything without knowing what’s in it for them And they keep upping the ante Soon I’ll have to start forking over cash to get them to behave These materials are copyrighted by the Center for Educational Development (2015) Posting of these materials on another website or distributing them in any way is prohibited English as a Second Language Podcast www.eslpod.com ESL Podcast 1086 – Giving Bribes to Children for Good Behavior Aaron: I don’t know what to say When I was growing up, my mother put the fear of God into us We wouldn’t dare misbehave for fear of making her angry We never got rewards for good behavior It was just expected of us Camille: What’s your mother’s number? Is she available to babysit? Aaron: Uh, I don’t know I don’t think she could inspire that kind of obedience from other people’s children Camille: I’m desperate! At the very least, she can give me a few parenting lessons [end of dialogue] Our dialogue begins with Camille saying, “No, you can’t have a new bike if you get an A on the test.” Camille is talking to her son or daughter, we guess The child has asked his mother if he could get “a new bike” – a new bicycle – if he gets an A on his test An A is the highest score that you can get on a test or an examination or a school assignment Camille says to her child, “You should study because you want to well in school.” In other words, you shouldn’t study just to get a reward, a prize You should study because you want to be successful in school Camille says, “We’ll talk about it when I get home tonight.” Next we hear from Aaron, who appears to be with Camille – another adult who has been listening to Camille talk to her child Aaron says, “What’s the matter?” meaning “What’s wrong?” What’s the problem? Camille says, “My kids” – my children – “won’t anything without an incentive.” An “incentive” (incentive) is something that motivates you to something, something that makes you want to something else For some people, an incentive might be money They might work harder in order to get more money The money is an incentive Camille says, “I know it’s my fault for offering rewards for good behavior, but now all they want to know is what they’ll get to what I ask.” Camille is saying that it’s her “own fault,” meaning the blame is on her She is responsible for this situation The situation is that her children won’t anything without a “reward” (reward) A reward is something you give to someone – sometimes to thank him or her for doing something for you, sometimes because the person has done something that you think is good and you want to encourage them to it even more These materials are copyrighted by the Center for Educational Development (2015) Posting of these materials on another website or distributing them in any way is prohibited English as a Second Language Podcast www.eslpod.com ESL Podcast 1086 – Giving Bribes to Children for Good Behavior Camille has been giving her children rewards for good behavior “Good behavior” is when someone acts nice, is polite, does what he or she is told It’s a term we often use in describing the way children act Aaron says, “Rewards are okay if you use them sparingly, aren’t they?” “To use something sparingly” (sparingly) means to use it not very often If you use, say, salt sparingly on your food, you’re only going to put a little bit of salt, not very much, on your food Camille says, “That’s the problem I feel like I have to bribe them to the simplest things.” “To bribe” (bribe) means to give someone money to something that he or she should anyway So, for example, if you need to get something from the government, some government officials – some people who work for the government – might ask you for some extra money to what they should anyway That would be an example of having to bribe someone to something Camille feels like she has to bribe her children “to the simplest things.” She says, “I get home from work and I’m tired and frazzled.” “To be frazzled” (frazzled) means to be very tired, to be worn out, to not be able to think clearly about something Camille says, “I don’t want another power struggle, so I rely on bribes.” A “struggle” (struggle) is a conflict, a fight A “power struggle” is when you have two people who are trying to control a situation, two people who are trying to show that they have the power or the authority to control a certain situation Sometimes parents and children have a power struggle The child wants to get what he wants, the parent wants to get what he or she wants, and that results in problems Camille relies on bribes She depends on bribes to get her children to what she wants However, she says, “It’s backfired” (backfired) “To backfire” means to have the opposite effect to what you wanted or planned – to the opposite of what you think is supposed to happen So, for example, you may want your child to go to bed at eight o’clock at night So, you tell the child, “You go to bed right now,” but instead, the child starts crying and crying and complaining, and eventually you let the child stay up for another hour Your plan “backfired.” Instead of getting the child to go to bed eight o’clock, the child stayed up for another hour By the way, my mother tells me that I was never like this as a child I was, I think her words were, “a perfect child” – an “angel,” she once told me Well, I think that’s what she said Anyway, Aaron says, “How you mean?” “How you mean?” is a question we use when we don’t understand exactly what the person is saying – when we want the person to give us more information or more details These materials are copyrighted by the Center for Educational Development (2015) Posting of these materials on another website or distributing them in any way is prohibited English as a Second Language Podcast www.eslpod.com ESL Podcast 1086 – Giving Bribes to Children for Good Behavior Camille says, “Now my kids won’t anything without knowing what’s in it for them.” The expression “what’s in it for them” (or “for me”) means the advantage or the benefit that someone will receive because they something Someone may say to you, “I want you to go to the store and buy me a watch,” and you may be wondering, “Well, why would I that?” So, you might say to the person, “Well, what’s in it for me?” In other words, what benefits I get? That’s what Camille’s children tell her Camille says, “And they,” her children, “keep upping the ante.” “To up the ante” (ante) is a betting expression It’s the amount of money that you bet, say, in poker or in other games before the game begins or at the beginning of the game “To up the ante” means to increase it Here it means to increase the risks or increase the rewards for some action Camille says, “Soon, I’ll have to start forking over cash to get them to behave.” “To fork (fork) over” some amount of money means to give someone a large amount of money even if you don’t want to Camille is saying that she has to give her children money, or she fears she will have to give her children money, to get them to behave Aaron says, “I don’t know what to say When I was growing up, my mother put the fear of God into us.” This expression “to put the fear (fear) of God” into someone or in someone means to frighten someone, to make someone scared so that the person will what you want him or her to That was certainly true with my father Aaron says, “We wouldn’t dare misbehave for fear of making her angry.” “Dare” (dare) means to something that is very difficult or challenging – that is not “socially acceptable,” we might say If you say you wouldn’t dare something, you mean that you wouldn’t it under any circumstances In this case, Aaron is talking about not daring to misbehave, to act badly, for fear of making his mother angry The expression “for fear of” means because one is afraid of Aaron says, “We never got rewards for good behavior It was just expected of us.” Camille then asks Aaron, “What’s your mother’s number,” meaning her telephone number “Is she available to babysit?” “To babysit” (babysit) means to take care of someone else’s child, usually for money Aaron says, “Uh, I don’t know I don’t think she could inspire that kind of obedience from other people’s children.” Aaron is saying that his mother probably can’t help Camille because she probably could not “inspire that kind of obedience.” “To inspire” (inspire) means to create a certain feeling, want, or desire in another person Aaron is saying he These materials are copyrighted by the Center for Educational Development (2015) Posting of these materials on another website or distributing them in any way is prohibited English as a Second Language Podcast www.eslpod.com ESL Podcast 1086 – Giving Bribes to Children for Good Behavior doesn’t think his mother would be able to make Camille’s children obedient “Obedient” comes from the word “obedience” (obedience), which means an agreement to what someone tells you to – to follow someone else’s orders Camille says, “I’m desperate!” (desperate) “To be desperate” means to want something very badly, thinking that you don’t have any other choices, any other options Camille says, “At the very least, she can give me a few parenting lessons.” Camille is asking to speak with Aaron’s mother so that “at the very least,” meaning at minimum, Aaron’s mother can give her some parenting lessons “Parenting” (parenting) refers to the act of bringing up or raising children, how you treat your children, what sort of things you say and with your children That is part of parenting Now let’s listen to the dialogue, this time at a normal speed [start of dialogue] Camille: No, you can’t have a new bike if you get an A on the test You should study because you want to well in school We’ll talk about it when I get home tonight Kids! Aaron: What’s the matter? Camille: My kids won’t anything without an incentive I know it’s my own fault for offering rewards for good behavior, but now all they want to know is what they’ll get to what I ask Aaron: Rewards are okay if you use them sparingly, aren’t they? Camille: That’s the problem I feel like I have to bribe them to the simplest things I get home from work and I’m tired and frazzled I don’t want another power struggle, so I rely on bribes It’s backfired Aaron: How you mean? Camille: Now my kids won’t anything without knowing what’s in it for them And they keep upping the ante Soon I’ll have to start forking over cash to get them to behave Aaron: I don’t know what to say When I was growing up, my mother put the fear of God into us We wouldn’t dare misbehave for fear of making her angry We never got rewards for good behavior It was just expected of us These materials are copyrighted by the Center for Educational Development (2015) Posting of these materials on another website or distributing them in any way is prohibited English as a Second Language Podcast www.eslpod.com ESL Podcast 1086 – Giving Bribes to Children for Good Behavior Camille: What’s your mother’s number? Is she available to babysit? Aaron: Uh, I don’t know I don’t think she could inspire that kind of obedience from other people’s children Camille: I’m desperate! At the very least, she can give me a few parenting lessons [end of dialogue] Your incentive for listening to the wonderful scripts by Dr Lucy Tse is an improvement in your English – at least, we hope so From Los Angeles, California, I’m Jeff McQuillan Thank you for listening Come back and listen to us again right here on ESL Podcast English as a Second Language Podcast was written and produced by Dr Lucy Tse, hosted by Dr Jeff McQuillan Copyright 2015 by the Center for Educational Development 10 These materials are copyrighted by the Center for Educational Development (2015) Posting of these materials on another website or distributing them in any way is prohibited  ... shouldn’t have) sharenting share stories, pictures, and more about their children Sometimes they share things that nobody else even wants to know about Some people argue that sharenting is a... website at ESLPod. com Become a member of ESL Podcast Take a look at our ESL Podcast Store You could also like us on Facebook at facebook.com /eslpod Oh, yeah – we’re on Twitter too, at @eslpod This. .. prohibited English as a Second Language Podcast www .eslpod. com ESL Podcast 1086 – Giving Bribes to Children for Good Behavior CULTURE NOTE Sharenting Parents are “proud” (with feelings of pleasure