Anger Management Skills Does everybody experience anger?  Everybody gets angry That is okay You’re going to feel how you feel BUT: how you act is up to you And that matters, because how you act leads to consequences Objectives:     Identify your anger triggers Know your anger cues Know your anger style Deal with your anger effectively TRIGGERS What bugs you? Wh at  Something that happens that makes you angry  What triggers you does not always trigger someone else You have the highest avera ge on social studies tests, but when repor t cards are handed out, the teacher gives someone else a higher gr ade than you because he par t icipates in class more than you a b c not at all angry somewhat angry very angry Your brother bumps your ar m while you reach for something at the dinner table, and you knock over a pitcher The pitcher breaks and you get blamed a not at all angry b somewhat angry c very angry Your best friend has a secret that she tells to two other friends but not to you a b c not at all angry somewhat angry very angry A classmate spills juice on your homewor k and the teacher says it’s too sloppy to hand in a b c not at all angry somewhat angry very angry One of your friends is so bossy that she insists on telling you who to invite to your bir t hday par t y a b c not at all angry somewhat angry very angry A kid in the par k insults your best friend a not at all angry b somewhat angry c very angry MAKE A LIST  If you know your anger triggers, then you can either:  Try to avoid them  Learn how to deal with them ANGER CUES Clenched fist Racing & pounding heartbeat Sweat  Your body sends you signals, when you’re getting angry Loud voice Red face Upset stomach Complete the Checklist  What are your anger cues? W h at’s your anger style?  When your anger is triggered, you’re going to react in some way The way you react is called your ANGER STYLE Dumping Acting Out Burying ACTING OUT  Easiest to recognize  It’s when you strike out at the person you are mad at: physically or verbally  YOU’RE OUT OF CONTROL!!!! Consequences You get in trouble Problem is not solved DUMPING DISPLACED ANGER  Shifting your feelings to someone you feel it’s safe to be mad at  Ex Guy gets mad at his boss, comes home & yells at his wife, who yells at the kids, who kick the dog!! Consequences  You hurt innocent people  Problem is not solved BURYING (ignoring)  When you hold your anger down inside yourself because you think it isn’t nice to have those feelings  Denying your angry isn’t dealing with it  It can come out in other ways: headaches, stomachaches, anxious, depressed  One day you might explode!! Consequences  You hurt yourself  You may hurt others when you EXPLODE  Problem is not solved DEALING WITH ANGER  When you find yourself angry, REMEMBER the only behavior you can manage is YOUR own!!!  So, pay attention to your anger cues  And, if you feel like you’re going to lose it… Get a grip!!!  Cool off, stay calm  Walk away  Count to 10  Take deep breaths  Use calming self-talk: “I can handle this Chill It’s not as bad as it seems.”  Imagine you are in a peaceful place  Give yourself some time to sort things out  Write the problem down on paper  Think it through Ask yourself: what really happened? How was I triggered? What were my cues  Talk it over with a friend or adult you trust  Turn your angry energy into a change for the better  Tell the person making you angry how you feel  Channel your angry energy into a physical activity  Try to solve the problem  Try to accept situations you can’t change EVERYBODY GETS ANGRY  That’s just how it is  The difference comes in what you about it SO: GET A GRIP!!!