Chapter Coordination and Subordination: What to Say When the Cops Come In This Chapter • Learn how to coordinate ideas • Explore subordination • Achieve parallel structure When you write effective sentences, you move beyond mere correctness to writing with style and grace It's like moving from Martha Washington to Madonna, or from a Ford to a Ferrari This chapter introduces you to the nitty-gritty of writing well First you learn how to coordinate and subordinate clauses to communicate relationships between two or more ideas Then I show you how to use parallel structure to make sure your ideas are expressed in a logical way 178 Part : Usage and Abusage Coordination: All the Right Moves You coordinate your outfits, home furnishings, and dance moves So why not coordinate your sentences to give them some style as well? In the previous chapter, you learned how to connect the parts of a sentence There, I touched on coordinating independent clauses Let's kick it up a notch and get into the nitty-gritty of coordinating independent clauses Sometimes you want to show that two or more ideas are equally important in a sentence In such cases, you're looking to coordinate Sentence coordination links ideas of equal importance This process gives your writing harmony by bringing together related independent clauses There are four main ways to You Could Look It Uo coordinate independent clauses You can use: Sentence coordination inks ideas of equal importance Coordinating conjunctions • for • and Quoth the Maven Remember to use a comma between coordinating conjunctions that join two independent clauses, unless the clauses are very short • nor • but • or • yet • so • Correlative conjunctions • either or • neither nor • not only but also • both and • Semicolons and conjunctive adverbs As you learned in Chapter 4, there are many different conjunctive adverbs Here are some examples: • ; furthermore, • ; therefore, • ; for example, • ; however, • A semicolon C h a p t e r \k: Coordination and Subordination: What to Say When the Cops Come 179 Mix and Match Coordination isn't just slapping on a black tie with a white shirt or putting some parsley on a leg of lamb No siree; coordination involves using the right word or mark of punctuation to show different relationships between ideas For example, each of the coordinating conjunctions has a different meaning, as the following table shows Coordinating Conjunctions and Their Shades of Meaning Coordinating Conjunction Meaning Function for because to show cause and also to link ideas nor negative to reinforce negative but however to contrast ideas or choice to show possibilities yet however to contrast so therefore to show result Correlative conjunctions convey balance, while semicolons and conjunctive adverbs indicate relationships such as examples, continuation, and contrast A semicolon alone shows that the ideas are of equal importance Strictly Speaking A coordinate sentence is also known as a compound sentence You learned all about compound sentences in Chapter Dancing Cheek-to-Cheek Follow these steps when you coordinate independent clauses: Decide which ideas can and should be combined Select the method of coordination that shows the appropriate relationship between ideas Each way to form compound sentences establishes a slightly different relationship between ideas Often, there's no "right" answer when you're choosing which conjunctions and punctuation to use to coordinate ideas With practice, you'll discover that some sentences sound smoother and more logical than others Here are some examples to help you get your ear in tune: 180 Part : Usage and Abusâge Uncoordinated: Years ago most baseball players were recruited right out of high school or from the minors Today, most play college baseball and then move on to the major leagues Coordinated: Years ago most baseball players were recruited right out of high school or from the minors, but today most play college baseball and then move on to the major leagues Coordinated: Years ago most baseball players were recruited right out of high school or from the minors; however, today most play college baseball and then move on to the major leagues But and however are used to show contrast Danger, Will Robinson Be careful not to connect unrelated ideas, establish a vague connection among ideas, or connect too many ideas in one sentence The first and second errors confuse your readers; the third causes "stringy sentences." Uncoordinated: Star Trek was very successful in syndication It was not a big hit during its original run from 1966 to 1969 Coordinated: Star Trek was very successful in syndication, yet it was not a big hit during its original run from 1966 to 1969 Coordinated: Star Trek was very successful in syndication; nevertheless, it was not a big hit during its original run from 1966 to 1969 Yet and nevertheless are used to show comparison Don't Strinq Me Alonq What happens if you go coordination crazy? You end up with a stringy sentence A stringy sentence contains too many ideas connected by coordinating conjunctions or then Repetitious and hard-to-follow, stringy sentences are as annoying as stringy celery or stringy cheese Here's an example of a stringy sentence: • Mount Everest is in the Himalayas and it is the world's tallest mountain and so climbing it is very difficult so Edmund Hillary and Tenzing Horgay first climbed it in 1963 and everyone applauded their achievement To correct a stringy sentence, place closely related ideas in one sentence, and less closely related ideas in their own sentences Here's a variation that achieves logic as well as emphasis of ideas: • Because Mount Everest, in the Himalayas, is the world's tallest mountain, climbing it is very difficult It was not until 1963 that the first explorers, Edmund Hillary and Tenzing Horgay, conquered the mountain to great acclaim C h a p t e r \k: Coordination and Subordination: What to Say When the (ops (ome 181 Why Not Give It a Shot? Take a few minutes to link the following simple sentences by adding coordinating conjunctions, correlative conjunctions, conjunctive adverbs and semicolons, or semicolons alone In the Great Fire of London in 1666 half of London was burnt down Only six people were injured New York stockbroker Bill Wilson and Ohio surgeon Robert Smith both had a drinking problem They joined forces and started Alcoholics Anonymous Most people don't keep their New Year's resolutions for more than a few weeks They don't make resolutions in the first place The oldest female elephant in the herd usually leads the other elephants The other female elephants are ranked below her in age The puppy pulled all the slippers from under the bed She shredded all the toilet paper Answers Possible responses: In the Great Fire of London in 1666 half of London was burnt down, but only six people were injured, (shows contrast) 182 P a r t ) : Usage and Abusage New York stockbroker Bill Wilson and Ohio surgeon Robert Smith both had a drinking problem, so they joinedforcesand started Alcoholics Anonymous, (shows result) Most people don't keep their New Year's resolutions for more than a few weeks or they don't make resolutions in the first place, (shows choice) The oldest female elephant in the herd usually leads the other elephants; the other female elephants are ranked below her in age (semicolon shows closely linked ideas) The puppy pulled all the slippers from under the bed, and she shredded all the toilet paper, (coordinating conjunction shows ideas of equal importance) Subordination: What I Did for Love Coordination shows the relationship among equal independent clauses; subordination, in contrast, shows the relationship between ideas of unequal rank Subordination is connecting two unequal but related clauses with a subordinating conjunction to form a complex sentence When you subordinate one part of a sentence to another, you make the dependent You Could Look It Up clause develop the main clause Subordination can Subordination is conhelp your sentence in many ways Here are three necting two unequal but related biggies: clauses with a subordinating conjunction to form a complex sentence • To trace ideas unfolding • To show specific relationships among ideas • To stress one idea over another Quoth the Maven , As you learned in Chapter 3, subordinating conjunctions link an independent clause to a dependent clause There are many subordinating conjunctions, including offer, although, because, before, if, though, since, when, till, unless, wherever, and where A more complete list appears in Chapter As a result, subordination can give your writing and speech greater logic, coherence, and unity As with sentence coordination, sentence subordination is more than random switcheroos Subordination requires logic and thought Follow these four steps to subordinate sentence ideas: Decide which idea or clause is the most important It will be the information you most want to emphasize in the reader's mind Designate this as the "main clause." C h a p t e r \k: Coordination and Subordination: What to Say When the Cops Come Select the subordinating conjunction that best expresses the relationship between the main clause and the dependent clause Arrange the clauses to achieve logic, coherence, rhythm, and polish 183 Strictly Speaking Conjunctions and conjunctive adverbs can also be called transitions because they signal connections between ideas The following table shows some of the most common subordinating conjunctions and the relationships that they show between ideas Relationship Subordinating Conjunctions Cause, reason as, because Choice whether, rather than Condition even if, if, unless, provided that Contrast though, even though, although Effect, result so, so that, in order that, that Location wherever, where Time once, whenever, since, until, when, while, after, before Follow the Leader Here are some examples of effective sentence subordination: Not subordinated: You lick a postage stamp You consume one tenth of a calorie Subordinated: When you lick a postage stamp, you consume one tenth of a calorie Starting the dependent clause with the subordinating conjunction "when" gives a reason for the main clause Not subordinated: You are a typical American man You spend four hours a year tying your tie Subordinated: If you are a typical American man, you spend four hours a year tying your tie Starting the dependent clause with the subordinating conjunction "if" gives a reason for the main clause Danger, Will Robinson Be careful not to switch the main clause and the dependent clause when you subordinate If you put the main idea in a dependent clause, your sentence will not be logical, as this example shows: Because the TV camera focused on him, Todd wore a bright blazer The sentence should read: Because Todd wore a bright blazer, the TV camera focused on him IM Part 3: Usage and Abusage Dice V Slice Choppy sentences are a series of short sentences that create an annoyingly abrupt rhythm Because there is no subordination in a series of choppy sentences, each idea is given equal emphasis Like a date from the dark side, choppy sentences are abrupt, boring, and repetitious For instance: • Director John Ford banned the use of makeup while he filmed The Grapes of Wrath John Ford also banned artificial lighting He also banned special camera effects He wanted to stay true to the realistic nature of Steinbeck's novel Try some sentence combining and subordination of ideas to achieve meaning, emphasis, and rhythm • In an attempt to stay true to the realistic nature of The Grapes of Wrath, director John Ford banned the use of makeup, artificial lighting, and special camera effects while he filmed Steinbeck's novel Double Dare It's time to put up or shut up Use subordinating conjunctions to link the ideas in each of the following sentence pairs First decide which clause will be dependent and which one will be independent Write your answers in the spaces provided You put a ton of Jell-O in the swimming pool You still can't walk on water The word trousers is an uncommon noun It is singular at the top and plural at the bottom Milk stays fresh Keep it in the cow You have quarters, dimes, and pennies You have $1.19, the largest amount of money in coins without being able to make change for a dollar C h a p t e r \k: Coordination and Subordination: What to Say When the (ops Come 5 Thomas Jefferson was broke when he died He was one of America's most brilliant presidents Answers Possible responses: Even if you put a ton of Jell-O in the swimming pool, you still can't walk on water The word trousers is an uncommon noun because it is singular at the top and plural at the bottom So that milk will stay fresh, keep it in the cow If you have quarters, dimes, and pennies, you have $1.19, the largest amount of money in coins without being able to make change for a dollar Although Thomas Jefferson was broke when he died, he was one of America's most brilliant presidents Duke It Out: Coordination Versus Subordination When to coordinate? When to subordinate? Most often, the logic of the ideas dictates the placement of those ideas in main clauses or dependent clauses Here's the rule of thumb: • Coordinate when you want to link related independent clauses • Subordinate when you want to put the most important idea in the main clause and give less importance to the idea in the dependent clause Here are some examples that show each sentence strategy at work: Two clauses: The sky became a frightening gray The mood was ominous Coordinated: The sky became a frightening gray, and the mood was ominous Subordinated: As the sky became a frightening gray, the mood was ominous With this construction, the mood is the focus Subordinated: As the mood became ominous, the sky became a frightening grayr With this construction, the sky is the focus 186 Part : Usage and Abusdge Parallel Structure: Trod the Straight and Narrow Parallel structure means putting ideas of the same rank in the same grammatical structure Your writing and speech should have parallel words, phrases, and clauses Parallel structure gives your writing many admirable strengths, including the following: • You Could Look It Up Parallel structure means putting ideas of the same rank in the same grammatical structure You can have parallel words, phrases, and clauses , Rhythm • Emphasis • Balance • Impact • Crispness • Conciseness Here's how to create parallel words, phrases, and clauses: • Parallel words share the same part of speech (such as nouns, adjectives, or verbs) and tense (if the parallel words are verbs) • My date was obnoxious, loud, and cheap; no doubt he thought I was gorgeous, personable, and witty • We pleaded, begged, and prayed—to no avail • Parallel phrases create an underlying rhythm in your speech and writing, as these examples show: • "For taking away our Charters, abolishing our laws, and altering the Forms of our Government " (Declaration of Independence) • "Now the trumpet summons us again—not as a call to bear arms, though arms we need—not as a call to battle, though embattled we are—but a call to bear the burden of a long twilight struggle " (John F Kennedy's inauguration speech) • Parallel clauses can give your writing balance as well For instance: • "Let every nation know, whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose any foe to assure the survival and success of liberty." (John F Kennedy's inauguration speech) • "Our chiefs are killed; Looking-Glass is dead; Ta-Hool-Shute is dead." (Chief Joseph's surrender speech, 1877) C h a p t e r : Coordination and Subordination: What to Say When the (ops Cone ^ ) Take My Word for It Some of the world's most famous documents and speeches derive power from parallel structure In his famous 1963 speech on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial, for example, Dr Martin Luther King Jr created an enduring statement with these parallel phrases: "I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plains, and the crooked places will be made straight, and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together." Make It So Be sure to brush after every meal, wear clean underwear in case you are in a car accident, and use matching forms to create parallel structure Here are some examples to show how creating parallel structure can improve your oral hygiene, raise your social status, and make your writing better: Not parallel: To avoid getting hit by lightning, never seek protection under a tree, lying down on wet ground, or not staying on a bike Parallel: To avoid getting hit by lightning, never seek protection under a tree, lie down on wet ground, or stay on a bike Because the phrases "match," the sentence sounds smoother and more logical Not parallel: During a thunderstorm, people who are inside should not talk on the telephone, standing near open windows, and using large appliances Parallel: During a thunderstorm, people who are inside should not talk on the telephone, stand near open windows, or use large appliances Now that it's parallel, this sentence is balanced and less wordy i^ / Quoth the Maven _ Because parallelism has to with the sound of language, read sentences aloud as you work Time to Face Old Sparky Revise each of the following sentences so the elements are parallel Write your answers on the lines provided 188 Part : Usage and Abusage Groucho Marx said to one of his leading ladies: "Martha, dear, there are many bonds that will hold us together through eternity: your savings bonds, the bonds that are called Liberty bonds, and the bonds you get from the government." In addition to being a puppeteer, the late Jim Henson was also a painter, an artist skilled with animation, and someone who liked to sculpt clay Contrary to legend, Ringo Starr never sang, "She's 16, she has beauty, and she belongs to me." The typical member of the Book-of-the-Month Club is well educated, his or her age is about 40, a Democrat (moderate variety) If you happen to be stranded at sea with a group and you see a shark, bunch together to form a tight circle, warned to be using shark repellent, staying dressed, and be sure to float as a good way to save energy Answers Possible responses: Groucho Marx said to one of his leading ladies: "Martha, dear, there are many bonds that will hold us together through eternity: your savings bonds, Liberty bonds, and government bonds." In addition to being a puppeteer, the late Jim Henson was also a painter, animator, and sculptor Contrary to legend, Ringo Starr never sang, "She's 16, she's beautiful, and she's mine." C h a p t e r \k: Coordination and Subordination: What to Say When the (ops Come 189 The typical member of the Book-of-the Month Club is well educated, about 40 years old, and a moderate Democrat If you happen to be stranded at sea with a group and you see a shark, bunch together to form a tight circle, use shark repellent, stay dressed, and float to save energy The Least You Need to Know • Sentence coordination links ideas of equal importance • Sentence subordination connects two unequal but related clauses with a subordinating conjunction to form a complex sentence • Parallel structure means putting ideas of the same rank in the same grammatical structure • Use 'em all to create logical, concise, and graceful writing  ... examples: • ; furthermore, • ; therefore, • ; for example, • ; however, • A semicolon C h a p t e r \k: Coordination and Subordination: What to Say When the Cops Come 179 Mix and Match Coordination. .. this as the "main clause." C h a p t e r \k: Coordination and Subordination: What to Say When the Cops Come Select the subordinating conjunction that best expresses the relationship between the main... Subordination: What to Say When the (ops Come 189 The typical member of the Book-of -the Month Club is well educated, about 40 years old, and a moderate Democrat If you happen to be stranded at sea