Free ebooks ==> www.Ebook777.com www.Ebook777.com Free ebooks ==> www.Ebook777.com From Strength to Strength A ma nu al f or p rofe ssi onals w se pa ho facilitate diver www.Ebook777.com re ups o r nt g This page intentionally left blank From Strength to A Strength ma nu al f or p rofe ssi are p e onals w s r ho facilitate dive ups o r nt g Pat Jewell & Prue Blackmore ACER Press Free ebooks ==> www.Ebook777.com Disclaimer: Some images in the printed version of this book are not available for inclusion in the eBook First published 2004 by ACER Press Australian Council for Educational Research Ltd 19 Prospect Hill Road, Camberwell, Victoria, 3124 Copyright © Pat Jewell, Prue Blackmore 2004 All rights reserved Except under the conditions described in the Copyright Act 1968 of Australia and subsequent amendments, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without the written permission of the publishers Edited by Renée Otmar, Otmar Miller Consultancy Pty Ltd Cover and text design by Polar Design Pty Ltd Printed by BPA Print Group National Library of Australia Cataloguing-in-Publication data: Jewell, Pat From strength to strength : a manual for professionals who facilitate diverse parent groups Bibliography ISBN 86431 531 Self-help groups - Management - Handbooks, manuals, etc Parenting - Study and teaching Family life education I Blackmore, Prue II Title 361.40715 Visit our website: www.acerpress.com.au www.Ebook777.com Foreword Each life is a leaf on the tree of humanity, each leaf contributing to the tree by converting light into energy In its turn the tree, through its roots in the earth, sustains each leaf When it is time for the leaf to fall, it nourishes the soil from which the roots of the tree draw their strength The parent-child relationship is at the heart of the process of generativity, the vital link in the intergenerational chain We are shaped but not determined by our parents, and we in turn, shape but not determine our children How we as parents nurture our children is of fundamental importance but there are other influences at work, ranging from the unique genetic predisposition of each individual through to the spirit of the age in which we live Today in many societies there is a crisis of confidence in relation to parenthood Being a mother or a father is devalued as individuals are increasingly defined by occupational status and materialistic markers Some parents are torn between the demands of the workplace and their children Children need to spend time with those who love them Other parents have no workplace – one in seven Australian children now lives in a household in which there is no adult employed in the workforce and there is a deep despair in the lives of many of these parents Children need to be nurtured in hope The emergence over the past century of the notion of the child as a psychological being has created an expectation of the perfect parent, and inhibited some parents from setting clear and consistent limits Paradoxically, many ‘parent education’ courses or what sometimes seem to be ‘parenting propaganda courses’ have eroded parental confidence even further It is wonderful to come across an approach to enhancing the abilities of parents that is based on their strengths, not their weaknesses, and which recognises that families come in all shapes and sizes It is very unusual to find an inclusive approach which tries to address the needs of all parents, including those who are living in prison or struggling with mental health or substance dependence problems Pat Jewell and Prue Blackmore have worked with parents from all backgrounds and there is a special warmth and wisdom to what they have to say about facilitating parent groups Last but not least, they remind us that strong families need strong communities.We have all become familiar with the African proverb that says it takes a village to raise a child, but it is now time for us all to ask ‘and what does each of us have to to rebuild the village?’ Across Australia parents are being connected with one another to rebuild a village for their children and for themselves – in new parent groups facilitated by maternal and child health nurses, in playgroups facilitated by early childhood educators, and in groups for parents who want to come together and explore how they might build on their strengths in doing what will always be the most important job in our lives – nurturing a new leaf on the tree of humanity Associate Professor Dorothy Scott, OAM Head, School of Social Work University of Melbourne This page intentionally left blank The Diversity Creed I believe that diversity is a part of the natural order of things—as natural as the trillion shapes and shades of the flowers of spring or the leaves of autumn I believe that diversity brings new solutions to an ever-changing environment, and that sameness in not only uninteresting but limiting To deny diversity is to deny life—with all its richness and many opportunities Thus, I affirm my citizenship in a world of diversity and with it the responsibility to … • Be tolerant Live and let live Understand that those who cause no harm should not be feared, ridiculed, or harmed—even if they are different • Look for the best in others • Be just in my dealings with poor and rich, weak and strong and whenever possible to defend the young, the old, the frail and the defenseless • Avoid needless conflicts and diversions, but be always willing to change for the better that which can be changed • Seek knowledge in order to know what can be changed, as well as what cannot be changed • Forge alliances with others who love liberty and justice • Be kind, remembering how fragile the human spirit is • Live the examined life, subjecting my motives and actions to the scrutiny of mind and heart so to rise above prejudice and hatred • Care by Gene Griessman © 1993 [www.theamericans.us] We have included The Diversity Creed because it is about embracing and acknowledging the many different pathways parents can take This manual acknowledges diversity and provides facilitators with a practical and flexible ‘mix and match’ resource with which to enhance the capacity of parents Prue and Pat Acknowledgements We would like to thank all the parents we have been privileged to meet and learn from over the past twenty years Their trust in us, their openness in sharing their hopes, dreams and issues has provided us with many humbling and enriching experiences Even in stressful circumstances, parents have shown determination and strength in their dreams for their children We have learned that all parents everywhere have one thing in common: they all want the best for their children Many friends and colleagues have been involved with this project, and we thank them: Jo Goldsworthy, who first approached us with the idea to write the manual and whose patience was tested as many deadlines came and went Constance Jenkin, whose professional contribution to the parenting field has been a guiding light for many—particularly the group-process framework, as developed in her manual Planning Happy Families: A kit for leaders (1988, C.A Jenkin) which we have referred to throughout this manual Melinda Moore, for her creative genius in naming the manual Professionals with expertise in specific fields who were asked to review the specialist modules; we thank them for their time, comments and contributions: Georgina Aldersea, Carolyn Corran, Catharine Hydon, Steve Martin, Julian McNally, Vicki Ross, Marina Stammers, Anne Stringer, Carol Taylor, Cathie Valentine and Bobby Yates Free ebooks ==> www.Ebook777.com Contents Glossary xi SECTION 1: How to use this manual Introduction Social change—its impact on parents and parenting Steps to establishing a parent group 10 SECTION 2: Background information for core modules Preparation and background information Child development Behaviour and discipline Communication Emotional wellbeing 29 31 35 37 39 SECTION 3: Session content for core modules 0–5 years Child development Behaviour and discipline Communication Emotional wellbeing 43 43 47 50 53 6–10 years Child development Behaviour and discipline Communication Emotional wellbeing 57 57 61 64 67 11–14 years Child development Behaviour and discipline Communication Emotional wellbeing 70 70 73 76 80 15–18 years Adolescent development Behaviour and discipline Communication Emotional wellbeing 83 83 86 89 92 www.Ebook777.com Group brainstorm Ask the group: “Why you think statutory child welfare is necessary for our community?” (The answer could be that some people hurt and/or kill children and that children need to be protected against this.) “What you think you have to to get statutory child welfare ‘out of your life’/‘off your back?’” From the comments arising out of this discussion, you should be able to create a list of possible content topics for the group (see suggestions above under possible content topics) Ask the group to decide together the order of content topics Wind down Around the group, ask parents to tell the group about one positive activity that they are going to (by themselves, with friends or family or with their child) before the following week Close Thank parents for coming Optional Hand out folders with information regarding the group venue, telephone numbers of the facilitators (for messages regarding absences) and dates and times of the group sessions The folders can then be used to hold any written handouts that may be distributed during the course of the group Following sessions Refer to the core modules for ideas on the session outline, warm-ups, content, homework and wind downs Relevant resources O’Brien, W (1993) ‘Making Parent Education Relevant to Vulnerable Families’, Families, October Kagen, R & Schlosberg, S (1989) Families in Perpetual Crisis, Markham, Ontario: Penguin Books Canada Turnell, A & Edwards, S (1999) Signs of Safety: A solution and safety oriented approach to child protection, New York: W.W Norton & Co Fro m 170 Stre ngt h to Stre n gt h with an Parents intellectual disability Preparation Intellectual disability (ID) is not a disease or an illness Parents who have an ID have impaired capacity to learn The definition of ID can encompass shortcomings in everyday life skills (deficits in adaptive behaviour), such as self-care and communication When planning a parent group for parents with an ID, the group itself and its content have to be structured to suit the needs of participants A parenting group is one component in the range of supports that parents with an ID need Parents with an ID could possibly be registered with the state or territory government through which they may be receiving in-home as well as support services Parents may be receiving support from a family support agency and/or be involved with a statutory child welfare agency if there are concerns about the risk of child abuse and neglect of children The following principles underpin any intervention work with parents with an ID: Persons with an ID have the same rights as other members of the community to services that support a reasonable quality of life Every person with an ID has a capacity for physical, social and emotional and intellectual development; has a right to individualised educational and developmental opportunities; and is entitled to exercise maximum control over every aspect of their lives The needs of persons with an ID are best met when the conditions of their everyday lives are the same as, or as close as possible to, norms and patterns which are valued in the general community Services to persons with an ID should be sufficiently flexible in structure and organisation to meet their varying needs in developing towards independence and to maximise their choices There is an extensive range of issues confronting parents with an ID These include: Negative community attitudes, particularly judgemental attitudes that parents with an ID not have the necessary skills, or should not be ‘allowed’, to parent The need for extra practical and emotional support with parenting skills Parents with an ID are often not listened to by professionals and others Only short-term support services are available when, in fact, long-term supports are needed There is often an overwhelming number of uncoordinated services involved with families It is important to remember that parenting skills are mostly learned through the family of origin Many parents with an ID have been institutionalised as children and therefore have missed out on the very basic concepts of being parented in a nurturing, loving environment When they become parents themselves they have a range of disadvantages that might include not having positive childhood experiences, low socioeconomic status, enduring financial and housing instabilities, and a lack of trust and fear of authority figures For this group, a structured children’s group can be extremely effective in assisting children to gain cognitive and physical skills, feel nurtured and build self-esteem in an with s t n are ty P isabili d tion c e S u ect tell al 171 Possible group aims For the Parent Group: To provide a safe, nurturing and confidential environment in which parents can explore their parenting issues To further develop parenting skills To build positive self-esteem and confidence in parents and children To build positive interactions between parents and their children To provide participants with resources and support networks For the Children’s Group: To build confidence and positive self-esteem in children To provide a safe environment in which children can learn social and language skills To provide activities that encourage children to develop their cognitive and physical skills To provide parents and children with a range of activities that are simple, inexpensive and transferable to the home Facilitation It is important to set up a safe and secure environment in which parents can feel respected and supported The facilitator’s role is critical to ensure that this occurs Facilitators need to: Maintain a non-judgemental approach to parents Ensure each parent’s rights to privacy and confidentiality within the group Provide a structured routine for each group session Offer the opportunity for each group member to speak, be heard and be validated There should be two professionals facilitating a group for parents with an ID One may have knowledge of ID and the other knowledge of group work with parents As these parents need many weeks (if not months) before they build up trust, consider the length of the group and the commitment of time and energy that will be required The learning of parents with an ID needs to be very repetitive and ongoing for even small changes to be sustained.The ‘Out of the Mainstream’ (see relevant resources) model utilised seven facilitators from a number of agencies on a rotating basis This allowed the group to continue over a long period of time (several years, in fact) but did not ‘burn out’ the facilitators Parents with an ID take a lot of time and energy, so you need to make time to have supervision and a debriefing time As some of the session will be with the children, the children’s group workers are an integral part of the facilitation team They provide appropriate role modelling for the parents in interacting with and handling the children, and model in an empowering way appropriate behaviour management techniques (For more information on facilitation, see pages 11–12.) Matching the group Intellectual disability is defined in various degrees: mild, moderate, severe and profound It is important to think about the level of ID that can be managed in the group Parents need to be able to adequately look after themselves as well as have the potential to be able to look after their children People with an ID may not be registered with the appropriate disability service in their state or territory; however, not all parents with an ID are registered Fro m 172 Stre ngt h to Stre n gt h You may have to think about the children of the parents who attend the group: will the parents all need to have their children in their care? Will all the parents not have their children in their care? What are the criteria that will be applied to group members? Experience has shown that whether the parents in the group have children in their care or not will make a significant difference to the group dynamics Parents with children in their direct care are sympathetic and supportive of those whose children are in alternative care situations Childcare/children’s group For children of parents with an ID, it is important to provide much more than childcare while the group is in progress Two early childhood workers are essential for the children’s group, for several reasons: Ratios of adult carers to children as per childcare regulations A child may attend with bruising or other signs of abuse/neglect that needs to be reported, and it is important to have another staff member witness what has been observed and record these The childcare workers need to be trained and experienced in working with pre-school children as well as nurturing and positive in their interactions with children They need to be able to interact with parents who have an ID in a caring and empowering manner, and to be able to role model appropriate interactions with the children that not undermine the parents Importantly, they have to be able to work with children whose behaviour can be disruptive and whose level of hygiene may be low It is advisable to have available information forms to fill in together with the parents about their children’s individual needs, such as an information form that can be filled in at the end of the session indicating how the child managed in the session Referrals Parents whose ID prohibits them from looking after their children will probably not be appropriate for a parent group that is focusing on concrete parenting skills and strategies Referrals for the parent group could come from a variety of sources such as government and non-government disability services, statutory child welfare services, local family support agencies, Maternal and Child Health Nurses and agencies that provide support to parents with an ID Referrals could also be received from solicitors and the courts Parents with an ID will often take a long time to build up a sense of trust in the facilitators The group needs to be long-term rather than a short 6–8-week parent group, which is often seen to be the norm for mainstream parent groups It is important that when a referral is received the referring agency remains involved with the family The parent group then forms part of the range of services offered to the family The referring agency may be working with the family on issues such as housing, financial and legal matters, while the parent group concentrates primarily on parenting issues Prior to the group commencing, a home visit is highly recommended, as the parent can be introduced to you in a familiar environment In addition, a home visit gives you the opportunity to see the physical environment in which the family lives; this information can be useful For example, children have their own bedrooms? Information can also be determined about who is living in the family home and what other supports the family currently accesses in an with s t n are ty P isabili d tion c e S u ect tell al 173 Specific issues Parents with an ID often not have appropriate social skills to allow them to easily fit in with mainstream society A parent group, although not its main task, can provide a safe environment in which social skills can develop Organising the group over a lunch time is a subtle way to this, so that parents learn about different food groups and how to eat together Lunch is a useful opener to discussions about food, nutritional value, cooking for children, the importance of eating together at the table and many other issues Part of each of the group sessions should involve the children Parents can learn to understand their children’s developmental stages and to enjoy children’s company while learning a range of skills Parents and children can enjoy planned activities such as drawing, pasting, dancing and music activities, which can be tried at home during the week Parents can also learn, in a very practical way, positive behaviour management skills and how to look after their child’s physical and emotional needs With any type of learning disability, small gains take a long time to eventuate, so only limited outcomes can be measured in a short-term group Group content topics need to be repeated many times in every new situation in order to make an impact on the parent’s learning With any new crisis in the parent’s lives, confidence and self-esteem is lowered Subsequently, some newly learnt skills will be lost and the relationship between parent and child may deteriorate Parents with an ID process information in a concrete way, and they are often unable to understand abstract concepts The information given to parents needs to be able to directly relate to their own situations in order to have any long-term effect Parenting information needs to be repeated regularly as children move into another developmental stage Often, adults with an ID cannot transfer the information they receive from one situation to another Many parents with an ID are not literate; however, they need to be treated as any group of adults in the community, so handouts that are read through and explained can still be distributed to parents Pictorial information is very useful for this group of parents Video is a good medium, especially clips from television programs that portray a parenting issue that is useful for the group Showing the clip then stopping the video for discussion is a good way to talk about general issues It is then important to bring the issue back to the specific so the parents can relate it to their own situations You will need to make decisions about: The duration of the group The number and skills of facilitators needed Whether the group will be open membership or closed Transport of parents to the group—will this be offered, or should parents make their own way to the group? How will the group cater for individual and differing learning needs? Group members might know each other outside the group, so you need to remind the group about respecting each other’s privacy, particularly the group rule that ‘what is said in the group stays in the group’ Providing a substantial meal rather than just refreshments Some sessions might involve the children as well, while role modelling appropriate play and other activities >> Fro m 174 Stre ngt h to Stre n gt h If parents are involuntarily referred to the group by statutory child welfare services, they are likely to be reluctant participants in the group Experience has shown that even the most reluctant participant cannot resist the ‘check-in’ part of the session, and will eventually tell their story The ‘check- in’ part of the group is very important for parents who have an ID This section invites parents to speak about anything that is worrying them It also allows for parents to bring to the group anything that they not understand, such as legal notices Issues such as police raids, altercations at school with children, not understanding what was decided at an assessment meeting or neighbours being abusive are examples of issues that can be raised and discussed This allows parents to be able to focus on parenting issues for the rest of the group time Any new parents attending the group can be invited to say something about themselves and their family if they want to They can be given this opportunity at the end of the check-in, after the regular parents have had their say Often, a new parent, especially if referred by child welfare services, will decline the invitation to speak until they have heard everyone else’s ‘check in’ When you invite them again to speak they will usually feel very comfortable doing so Hearing what the other parents are going through and that they are in similar situations gives parents ‘permission’ to speak about themselves Some of the parents in the group will not have been in a group situation before and will not know the basics of how a group works There may need to be several breaks during the session, depending on the concentration skills of the group Possible content The group content will come from the check-in or pressing issues section, though generally the topics are: Safety (self and children) Routines Managing behaviour Practical issues such as cooking for children, simple meals, nutrition Hygiene in self and children Building up confidence and self-esteem in parenting and adulthood Communication skills Anger management skills Social and personal boundaries Content topics discussed need to be concrete and practical, and should relate to an actual child, parent or situation Content topics need to be repeated so that information can be related to different situations Suggestions for a first session The purpose of the first session is to ensure that participants feel welcome, safe and happy to continue the following week Engage parents in the planning of the sessions for the following weeks The success of the first session is crucial to the engagement process (see pages 17–19) in an with s t n are ty P isabili d tion c e S u ect tell al 175 Warm-up Using the St Luke’s Bear Cards, ask each parent to select the cards that best make up her or his family as it is now Ask parents to talk about the names and ages of their children This can be written up on butcher’s paper, where it can be re-used each week as a reminder for parents about the names of children and as an acknowledgement of the children who may not be in the full-time care of some of the parents in the group Check-in The ‘check-in’ time in the group needs to allow each parent to have his or her say about his or her situation at the moment This could involve what she or he does not like or thinks is unfair about the systems involved—protective, legal and disability services, for example Parents’ feelings about what has happened to them and whose fault they perceive this to be need to be talked through It is then important that you reframe the situation by saying that what has happened up to now cannot be changed With the support of the group the parents will be able to understand what is happening from now on It is important to listen to parent’s stories, but just as important that the group does not become focused on criticising the system, but spends most of the time on parenting issues Suggested group rules One facilitator should lead a group discussion on rules for the group Group rules may need a lot of time to form, and may including some seemingly very basic rules as well as some rules to keep everyone safe These may include: Time and length of breaks Staying in the group until the official break Waiting to speak and not interrupting others Being respectful of others’ opinions Being respectful of other parents’ family situation No swearing or violence in the group Respecting confidentiality in the group Contacting a facilitator if unable to attend the group for any reason Once the group has decided on some rules, the other facilitator writes them on butcher’s paper that is then placed where all group members can see them each week If necessary, bring these to the group’s attention Group rules should be spoken about briefly each week Group brainstorm Lead discussion around “What would I like to learn from coming to this group?” The discussion may elicit comments such as, “To get the welfare off my back”, “To help my kids better”, for example From the group’s comments, create a list of content topics for future group sessions The group members can then determine which topics are to be discussed in which order in the coming weeks Wind down Around the group, each parent to talk about one thing she or he likes to to relax Close Thank parents for coming Fro m 176 Stre ngt h to Stre n gt h Optional Hand out folders with information regarding the group venue, telephone numbers of the facilitators (for messages regarding absences) and dates and times of the group sessions The folders can then be used to hold any written handouts that may be distributed during the course of the group For parents with an ID, these folders can become very important, as they are associated with a formal group experience in a learning environment Often the group will be the first positive learning experience that participants have ever had Following sessions Refer to the core modules for ideas on the session outline, warm-ups, content, homework and wind downs Relevant resources The following are published by the Department of Human Services Victoria, Disability Services, and may be downloaded from www.dhs.vic.gov.au; follow the links to ‘Disability Services’ and then ‘Our Publications’: Jewell, P (1998) Out of the Mainstream: A parenting group for parents with an intellectual disability and their children Jones, A (1996) Parents with an Intellectual Disability—A worker’s manual Llewellyn, G., McConnell, D., Grace-Dunn, R & Dibden, M (1999) Parents with an Intellectual Disability and Older Children—Strategies for support workers St Luke’s Innovative Resources (1993) Strength Cards, Bear Cards, available from ACER Press, 347 Camberwell Road, Camberwell, Victoria 3124, website www.acerpress.com.au Victorian Parenting Centre (2002) Signposts For Building Better Behaviour: Parent Program, available at www.vicparenting.com.au in an with s t n are ty P isabili d tion c e S u ect tell al 177 Parents with a mental illness Preparation It may be useful to consider forming a network of workers/ facilitators from a range of agencies to service this group Jewell and McGinn (1999) describe such a cross-system model for parenting groups with parents who have a psychiatric illness: “In working collaboratively with a number of different agencies, the service provides a much broader spectrum of service opportunities for participants It has certainly provided facilitators with a broader range of experiences and has helped prevent agency boundaries from becoming problematic.” Possible group aims To enhance and strengthen the parenting skills and strategies available to parents with a mental illness For parents with a mental illness to become more confident in their parenting skills and abilities For parents with a mental illness to feel less socially isolated and have increased options for accessing a network of support Facilitation Two facilitators are essential in facilitating this group At least one facilitator should have some knowledge about mental illness, the mental health system and the effects of medication, as well as its impact on the individual and his or her family The other facilitator needs to have an understanding of group process, dynamics and adult learning principles Both facilitators need to be prepared and have an understanding of the range of behaviours that may be brought to the group as part of the mental illness.These could include falling asleep in the group and behaving aggressively (strategies to manage these behaviours might need to be discussed as part of the group rules in the first session) The facilitator’s role should not become one of quasi-case manager The facilitator’s role should be impartial with regard to individual parent participants and be able to provide independent, non-judgemental parenting skills, strategies, support and encouragement (For more information on facilitation, see pages 11–12.) Matching the group Consider the target group: is the group intended for parents with a mental illness who have children in their full-time care, or will the group also target parents who have children in outof-home care (and/or in the statutory child welfare system)? Is the group being offered to parents who are not the primary caregivers but who have a shared care arrangement with the other parent or relative, or another care arrangement (such as foster care)? Consider whether primary and non-primary caregivers should be included together in the group, given that their needs as individuals (and subsequently as parents) may be diverse Nonresidential parents may be further demoralised or angered if they attend a group with parents who have children in their full-time care (and who also have a mental illness) Facilitators need to promote the group as primarily being one that looks at parenting, not one in which mental illness is the major focus Fro m 178 Stre ngt h to Stre n gt h Childcare/children’s group Quality childcare needs to be provided on site, preferably at no cost or at a minimum charge Referrals You could approach local community mental health clinics and community health centres, in order to proactively recruit parents with a mental illness to the group Contact could also be made with the relevant statutory child welfare authority staff to promote and advertise the group and obtain referrals to the group Specific issues If the parent has a mental health worker, it will be important that you establish a means of communication with that worker so that strategies and ideas discussed in the group can be followed through at home Additionally, the mental health worker needs to be aware that the client (the parent) has made a commitment to the group and will be expected to attend on a regular basis Similarly, if the child/children are clients of statutory child welfare services, the appropriate case manager should be made aware of the goals and objectives of the group as well as the practical focus and content.This also applies to other services and supports involved with the family, such as family support services Parents with a mental illness often have low self-esteem and little confidence in their parenting abilities, so the group should provide plenty of opportunities for strengthening parents’ self-image Similarly, if parents are involved with a statutory child welfare service as well as mental health services, they may feel disempowered Often, parents will have many appointments with various professionals during the week, and it may be useful for the facilitator to contact other professionals involved with the families, in order to rationalise and coordinate these appointments during the course of the group Possible content Looking after yourself/self-esteem Managing appointments—getting to places on time Social networks and social supports—using, building and strengthening them Dealing with and understanding government departments and the medical system Dealing with and understanding the education system (primary and secondary) Child development and behaviour—ages and stages Suggestions for a first session The purpose of the first session is to ensure that participants feel welcome, safe and happy to continue the following week Engage parents in the planning of the sessions for the following weeks The success of the first session is crucial to the engagement process (see pages 17–19) Warm-up Around the room, ask each parent to tell the group the names and ages of their children Write these up on butcher’s paper for use in future group sessions Suggested group rules One facilitator should lead a group discussion on rules for the group Group rules may need a lot of time to form, and may including some seemingly very basic rules as well as some rules to keep everyone safe These may include: Time and length of breaks a ith ts w aren P tion Sec nta me s nes l ill 179 Staying in the group until the official break Waiting to speak and not interrupting others Being respectful of other’s opinions Being respectful of other parents’ family situation No swearing or violence in the group Respecting confidentiality in the group Contacting a facilitator if unable to attend the group for any reason Once the group has decided on some rules, the other facilitator writes them on butcher’s paper that is then placed where all group members can see them each week If necessary, bring these to the group’s attention, although it may not be necessary to review them every week Group brainstorm Ask the group as a whole, “What has been the best thing about becoming a parent, and what has been the hardest thing?” From the comments coming out of this discussion, you should be able to create a list of possible content topics for the group (see suggestions above under possible content topics) Ask the group to decide together on the order of content topics Wind down Ask parents to share one activity that they like to to relax Close Thank parents for coming Optional Hand out folders with information regarding the group venue, telephone numbers of the facilitators (for messages regarding absences) and dates and times of the group sessions The folders can then be used to hold any written handouts that may be distributed during the course of the group Following sessions Refer to the core modules for ideas on the session outline, warm-ups, content, homework and wind downs Reference Jewell, H & McGinn, I (1999) ‘Parenting Together: A community peer support program’, in V Cowling (ed.) Children of Parents with Mental Illness, Melbourne: ACER Press Relevant resources Aldridge, J & Becker, S (2003) Children Caring for Parents with Mental Illness: Perspectives of young carers, parents and professionals Bristol, UK: Polity Cowling, V (ed.) (2004) Children of Parents with Mental Illness 2: Personal and Clinical Perspectives, Melbourne: ACER Press Cowling, V (ed.) (1999) Children of Parents with Mental Illness, Melbourne: ACER Press BOOKS FOR CHILDREN Sane Australia You’re Not Alone (2003) and Joe’s Diary (2001), available at website http://www.sane.org Fro m 180 Stre ngt h to Stre n gt h with substance-abuse Parents issues Preparation It is essential that facilitators agree about the purpose of the group and the target population For example, is the group aimed at parents presently actively involved with drug and alcohol services, or is it for those who have a past history of problematic use of alcohol and other drugs? Is the group one of voluntary attendance, or are the participants attending because of a mandatory (court or statutory child welfare authority) requirement? Is the overall group objective to enhance and strengthen already existing parenting skills, or is it to bring participants’ parenting skills to a minimum standard? Are participants the primary caregivers of their child/children, or are they not living with them at present? Possible group aims To enhance and strengthen the parenting skills and strategies available to parents with substance-abuse issues For parents with substance-abuse issues to become more confident of their parenting skills and abilities For parents with substance-abuse issues to feel less socially isolated and to have increased options for accessing a network of support Facilitation Two facilitators are essential for this parenting group, with at least one facilitator having knowledge of substance-abuse issues and their impact and effects on parenting The other facilitator should have knowledge of group process and adult learning principles As with any group work involving principles of adult learning, an understanding of group process and group dynamics is essential Ideally, the group will be resourced and facilitated by professionals representing a crosssection of the health and welfare service sector (For more information about facilitation, see pages 17–19.) Matching the group You will need to decide on the target group characteristics before recruiting parents to the group Is the group targeted towards parents with substance-abuse issues who have children in their full-time care, or will the group also be offered to parents who have children in out-ofhome care (and/or in the statutory child welfare system)? Alternatively, is the group being offered to parents who are not the primary caregivers but who have a shared care arrangement with the other parent, relative or other (such as foster care)? Think about whether the group can be managed with the inclusion of primary and non-primary caregivers, given that their needs as individuals (and subsequently as parents) may be diverse Non-residential parents may be further demoralised or angered if they attend a group with parents who have children in their full-time care (and who also have substanceabuse issues) s ith ts w aren s P ssue i tion Sec u nc bsta e bus e-a 181 Free ebooks ==> www.Ebook777.com In some cases, parents who have substance-abuse issues also have a diagnosed mental illness Consider whether parents with these complex personal issues would benefit from a parent group Are participants required to have acknowledged that they have a substance-abuse problem and/or that they are accessing appropriate therapy/detoxification services? Promote the group as primarily being one that looks at parenting skills and strategies, not one in which substance abuse is the major focus Childcare/children’s group You will need to be able to provide a safe and secure environment.This should be a place where the children not have any unnecessary responsibility and are allowed to play and be children The childcare workers need to have some knowledge of the effects parental substance abuse can have on children Referrals Referrals could be sought from agencies that would be likely to be already involved with parents with substance-abuse issues, such as drug and alcohol services, community health centres, Maternal and Child Health Nurses and statutory child welfare workers You will need to be clear about your expectations of participants For example: Regular attendance (what is reasonable)? Do you require notice if participants are unable to attend? Honesty about the level of drug/alcohol use/misuse Not abusing drugs and/or alcohol and are attending treatment and therapy Careful screening of participants is essential in order to determine whether parents are ready and/or able to give, take and learn from the group, or whether their drug and alcohol issues are too overwhelming to focus on their parent group experience Parents still undergoing drug detoxification, for example, are unlikely to be able to focus primarily on parenting issues Professionals from the relevant referring agencies should meet initially to discuss advertising—is it needed, are there enough potential clients from the current pool that people are working with, and what criteria for inclusion in the group are going to be applied? Specific issues Characteristics that are common to children whose parent(s) have substance-abuse issues include: Parents are often unable to give their children the time, attention and direction that they need Neglect of children can result in children missing school or arriving without lunch and inadequately dressed, for instance Children can take on the parenting role, looking after parents and other siblings Children may find it difficult to know how to be children if their own parents have passed on that responsibility Living in a household that does not have a routine or a consistent approach towards behaviour and/or other uncertainties (such as temporary accommodation) can result in children displaying physical and psychological disorders Children may have difficulty following through on long-term school projects and completing homework tasks.They may be inconsistent and erratic in school attendance and academic expectations >> Fro m 182 Stre ngt h to Stre n gt h www.Ebook777.com Parents who have substance-abuse issues often find it difficult to see a situation from the child’s perspective In this group it is important for parents to focus on their child’s experience Additionally, the child’s stage of development in relation to the parents’ expectations is important to talk through in the group The ‘pressing issues’ segment of the group is important for dealing with any overriding issues that parents may bring to the group, but you will need to remind the group that the primary focus is on parenting Possible content How to stay drug-free—setting up support networks Dealing with government departments, medical, child welfare and other services Understanding and dealing with the education system—primary and secondary How to organise and maintain a routine for yourself and your child Dealing with children’s emotions Suggestions for a first session The purpose of the first session is to ensure that participants feel welcome, safe and happy to continue the following week Engage parents in the planning of the sessions for the following weeks The success of the first session is crucial to the engagement process (see pages 11–12) Warm-up Ask each parent to tell the others the name and age of her or his child/children “How did you decide on that name, and why?” Suggested group rules One facilitator should lead a group discussion on rules for the group Group rules may need a lot of time to form, and may including some seemingly very basic rules as well as some rules to keep everyone safe These may include: Time and length of breaks Staying in the group until the official break Waiting to speak and not interrupting others Being respectful of others’ opinions Being respectful of other parents’ family situation No swearing or violence in the group Respecting confidentiality in the group Contacting a facilitator if unable to attend the group for any reason Once the group has decided on some rules, the other facilitator writes them on butcher’s paper that is then placed where all group members can see them each week If necessary, bring these to the group’s attention, although it may not be necessary to review them every week Group brainstorm Ask the group as a whole, “What has been the best thing about becoming a parent, and what has been the hardest thing?” From the comments coming out of this discussion, you should be able to create a list of possible content topics for the group (see suggestions above under possible content topics) Ask the group to decide together on the order of content topics s ith ts w aren s P ssue i tion Sec u nc bsta e bus e-a 183 Free ebooks ==> www.Ebook777.com Wind down Using St Luke’s Strength Cards, ask each parent to choose one card that represents a strength she or he has as a parent, and one card that represents a strength he or she has as a person Everyone in the group can choose to share their cards if they want to Close Thank parents for coming Optional Hand out folders with information regarding the group venue, telephone numbers of the facilitators (for messages regarding absences) and dates and times of the group sessions The folders can then be used to hold any written handouts that may be distributed during the course of the group Following sessions Refer to the core modules for ideas on the session outline, warm-ups, content, homework and wind downs Relevant resources Harbin, F & Murphy, M (eds) (2000) Substance Misuse and Childcare: How to understand, assist and intervene when drugs affect parenting, United Kingdom: Lyme Regis Russell House St Luke’s Innovative Resources (1993) Strength Cards, available from ACER Press, 347 Camberwell Road, Camberwell, Victoria 3124, website www.acerpress.com.au Fro m 184 Stre ngt h to Stre n gt h www.Ebook777.com ... working from a strength- based perspective (see page 7) Strength- based approach A strength- based approach to working with parents aims to strengthen relationships between parents and children, and to. .. intended to determine the topics week by week, it is advisable that the facilitator has a ‘fall back’ plan From Strength to Strength adopts strength- based and adult learning approaches to group... building on their existing strengths and adding to their creative solutions From Strength to Strength is designed for facilitators of parent groups who are (or who want to be) working with a wide