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No News is Good News Flip through the channels on any cable system in these United States and you will notice a recurring theme-CNN, MSNBC, Headline News, Fox News, and on and on Turn on the radio and you have the news stations, go to your front porch and you'll find a copy of The Boston Globe, the New York Times, or some other daily Your local store has racks and racks of news magazines, and the most popular sites on the Internet are dedicated to giving people up-to-the-second coverage of what is going on! It seems as though we cannot get away from the news in the Information Age If you pay attention to this constant bombardment of information, you will notice that a large portion of it is negative Stories of war, famine, scandal, murder, crime, and other scars on the human race crowd out the stories that tell all of the good that goes on Why? Because the modern adage "No News is Good News" is true The news providers know that the population is titillated with sordid details In fact, there is a name for the "good news." It is called fluff! What are the effects of this? It would be easy for someone reading or hearing the news to believe that the world is a sad place The inundation of negative reports are also self-feeding People eventually become numbed to the shock of war or murder to the point that they barely notice In addition, people no longer trust their political leaders-recent polls have the number of people believing that government officials are honest and well-meaning below 40% This is one adage I wish were not true I would like to see the purveyors of news be more fair in their coverage and give us the feel-good stories most of the time If that happened, our world would be much happier But it is unlikely to change-"No News is Good News" captures the state of mind our culture is in right now, and people would likely turn off a news channel or stop reading a newspaper that went to positive content Maybe in the future, after war and crime have been exorcised from society, this adage will seem like an artifact of history! Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones, But Names Will Never Hurt Me Who was not told this as a child? It has been said so many times that it is often shortened to "Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones…" with the last and most important part of the phrase left off! Parents want their kids to grow up to be "thick-skinned," to avoid the insults, personal attacks, and other negative influences that are likely to be directed at their child in elementary school and beyond They believe that if they repeat this enough, a child will believe it In reality, very few ever believe it-we all know the sting of someone calling us names or ridiculing us in some other manner Unfortunately, this childhood philosophy must now be moved to higher levels In earlier, more polite culture, people rarely talked ill of others directly on a personal level Now, personal attacks have become all too common Anyone wishing to make a name for themselves in this world must expect a barrage of negative attacks in print, over the air waves, and on the Internet Tabloids attack movie stars and even figures such as Mother Theresa Some TV shows exist solely to point out the personal problems of our government officials No matter what you say or do, someone will hear about it With our new technology, it is likely that you not even know them! And with that same technology, they can instantly attack you on the national and international stage With such openness, it is necessary for us, as adults, to grow skin thick enough to ignore the negative attacks and accept constructive criticism Real Soon Now This is one of the lesser known adages currently in use I first heard it a short time ago when one of my friends was asked when a project he was working on would be finished His response was "Real Soon Now." Two years later, the project was complete! There is a hint of sarcasm inherent in the statement "Real Soon Now." If someone responded with "I will be done shortly" or "It shouldn't be much longer now," those expressions could be interpreted literally With "Real Soon Now," though, it has become accepted that what is being referred to is nowhere near done More than that, the speaker of the adage has no idea when it will be finished This expression should only be used with close friends A report to your boss indicating that a crucial project will be done "Real Soon Now" will likely get you fired Telling your significant other that you will commit to marriage "Real Soon Now" will likely lead to you being alone in life A good example of when to use the phrase is if a friend asks you "When are you going to finish building that deck behind your house?" Your reply of "Real Soon Now" will likely lead to some laughter and, possibly, an offer of help! Kill Two Birds With One Stone The phrase to "Kill Two Birds With One Stone" has been around for a while, but it has taken on new meanings recently The generic meaning of the phrase is to accomplish two tasks by performing one action For example, if your male friend has asked you to set him up with a nice woman, and your woman friend asks you to set her up, you could arrange for them to meet It is as if with a single wellaimed throw of a stone (the solution) you killed two birds (the problems) If you were less efficient (or more original!) you would find a different woman for your male friend and a different man for your female friend Note that I used the phrase "if you were less efficient." This is why the adage has taken on a new importance recently With the fast paced world we live in, it has become increasingly necessary to perform as many tasks as quickly as possible By finding one solution that completes many tasks, you can get done faster Open Mouth, Insert Foot Once, the phrase "to stick one's foot in one's mouth" was common It meant that someone had said something that was inappropriate and, probably, embarrassing For example, if you were at an important dinner with a Microsoft executive and, in the course of telling a story, you accidentally mentioned that you wished a couple of big companies were unfairly limiting competition, you would have just "stuck your foot in your mouth." Currently, a more original version of that saying has come into usage It is "Open Mouth, Insert Foot." Obviously, this alludes to the step-by-step how-to guides that exist for just about everything (from using a computer to having sex) In addition, it can be said in a quicker and, perhaps, more witty fashion (Of course, as with all witty variations, it will shortly become passe-so watch out!) The most important thing to remember is to never be on the receiving edge of the "Open Mouth, Insert Foot" reference Polite company will try to get you out of your uncomfortable situation However, as polite company has become more and more limited to the Vatican alone, you are likely to be made to feel even more uncomfortable as those around you play up your foolishness! Even if they not, you are not likely to forget the uncomfortable feeling very quickly Don't Count Your Chickens Before They Hatch It is all too easy to assume that everything in life is going to work out perfectly Some people are so, shall we say, "structured" that they plan their entire lives for years assuming that things will happen exactly as they hope For example, some MIT students begin planning at the beginning of their freshman year what classes they will be taking through graduate school and then where they will end up working The problem is, once they fail one class or have a bad experience that leads them to doubt their major, all of these plans fall apart This is where the adage "Don't Count Your Chickens Before They Hatch." Literally, it refers to the fact that in any group of chicken eggs, some are not likely to be born A foolish farmer would think "There are ten eggs there, so I can expect to have ten chickens running around." According to the adage, though, a more realistic farmer would wait until they were actually hatched and adjust his farming plans based on how many were born If any fail to hatch, the foolish farmer is caught off guard The realistic farmer already expects to adjust, so he is much better off In general, we should plan the future based on what we expect to happen It is important, however, to always be flexible The MIT student mentioned above is wise to plan the classes they want to take They would be foolish if they did not have "contingency" plans Unfortunately things not always work out as we want, so we must be prepared for anything Don't Judge a Book By Its Cover We live in a very superficial society It is very easy to fall into the trap of looking only at the surface of people, things, and ideas without taking the time and effort to delve deeper into them This is where the adage "Don't Judge a Book By Its Cover" comes from Literally, you cannot tell the quality of the contents of a book just by looking at the material used to hold it together A book with a plain cover and simple title may be more important, more entertaining, or more useful than a book bound in a flashier manner This metaphor can be extended to many situations in life Perhaps the best example is the relationships between people If you see a beautiful woman (or man), would you immediately pursue them before an average looking person? In many cases, a person looking for a significant other would Unfortunately, the more average person may have a better sense of humor and a more interesting outlook on life The prejudice of deciding what to based solely on outward appearance could cost the pursuer the chance of a meaningful relationship It is difficult to change being so superficial, though Our sense of vision is very strong and it is easy to fall in the trap of believing the most beautiful, shiny, or flashiest object is inherently "better." Only by maintaining strict self-discipline can we force ourselves to put these prejudices aside and look deeper into everything we Who knows? The more beautiful woman may turn out to be a better match for you But you will never know if you always base your decision on what looks the best Only by looking at the less obvious features can we know what is truly the most outstanding person, object, or idea And then we will know it with confidence It's Like Shooting Fish in a Barrel Quick Think of the least challenging event you can Is one of them shooting fish in a barrel? Perhaps not, but somehow this has become the standard metaphor for something that is so easy anyone could it with no problem (It is similar to the adage "It's Like Stealing Candy from a Baby.) Humans are inherently lazy If we could have everything provided to us with no effort we would love it Fortunately, we are taught a work ethic as we are growing up and realize that we have to work for most things in life When something does occasionally come along that gives us something without trying very hard, we usually take it That is why something that is "like shooting fish in a barrel" is usually looked upon as a good thing There is another side of human nature though We are entertained and become more mature when we have to work through problems to attain our goal If I were just handed my degree from MIT without having to struggle through the classes to learn important skills, what would be the point? Everyone would know that an MIT degree was worthless-anybody could get one without effort It is the very fact that I have to work so hard to get the degree that it means something In this way, if getting an MIT degree were "like shooting fish in a barrel" it would become worthless So, saying that something is "like shooting fish in a barrel" does not necessarily convey any meaning about whether it is a good thing or a bad thing The context must be analyzed Even then, different people may have different views of whether it is good or bad Fortunately, adages are not always unambiguous in their meaning! It makes life more interesting and gives me something to talk about A Penny Saved is a Penny Earned America is, among industrialized countries, one of the worst at saving for the future While Europeans and Asians tend to save money for a rainy day, America likes to spend, spend, spend! The adage "A Penny Saved is a Penny Earned," a favorite of Ben Franklin, encourages us to save more money The use of a penny in the adage suggests that even saving small amounts can lead to prosperity in the future Why, then, are Americans so unwilling to listen to this advice? I wish I knew the answer Our culture is very focused on living in the present, entertaining ourselves, and living comfortably We rarely think of the future unless we are complaining about the sorry state of Social Security This is something we need to change Some people have questioned the very sentiment of this adage They argue that the penny has already been earned whether it is saved or not If the hamburger flipper at McDonald's makes $30 for one day of service, then walks next door and buys $30 of sports equipment, have they really not earned the money? Of course they have They have just sunk it into a material product that probably will not last very long Perhaps the way to best look at the adage today is to think of the interest that can be earned in our capitalist society If that same McDonald's worker put his $30 into a bank account with 3% interest, he would make about eight cents Of course, if he left the money there for several years without touching it, the compounded interest would raise that amount In this way, a penny saved really does earn a penny, albeit after a significant amount of time! Regardless of the literal correctness of the statement, the message to everyone, especially Americans, is to save more money for the future Enjoy life and be comfortable, but realize that you also want to enjoy life and be comfortable in the years ahead even if something terrible happens All is Fair in Love and War During times of real international conflict, military people must often justify their killing of other people by believing "all is fair in love and war." The dropping of the Atomic Bomb on Hiroshima has been justified because the Japanese leaders were evil and would have done the same to us if they could have That is, dropping the bomb was "fair." The phrase now, however, has entered into more popular culture to address more everyday conflicts If someone tarnishes my character in public, I will likely something to tarnish his character for not other reason than it is "fair." The most interesting aspect of the adage is the combination of love and war "All is fair in love" by itself does not mean very much Of course everything is fair in love-if I buy my wife a dozen roses to express my love, who will argue that isn't fair? The complete adage, however, intertwines love and war It suggests that the conquest of a lover is similar to the conquest of an enemy In some ways it isin both cases, the protagonist wants things to go his way and will go through any means to obtain it Whether the means are "outgifting" a potential mate or "outslandering" an opponent, both are declared fair by the adage I have to disagree with the message of this adage Someone declared that everything was allowed in all attempts at conquest This is a very selfish and short-sighted view of life It may ease the minds of the men going into battle to think that the deaths they cause are okay because, after all, it is war It may help a would-be lover to become a stalker because he believes it is a sign of his love In both cases, they are hiding behind the adage without having to think too hard about what they are really doing In fact, all IS NOT fair in love or war Torture, stalking, and killing are never acts of fairness Even if they are acts of retribution, does that really make it "fair?" No Therefore, I suggest that this adage fall out of usage It is a tool of the weak-minded to what they desire without thinking about the consequences The Grass is Always Greener on the Other Side Mr Smith looks out his window and sees his neighbor's lawn It looks so lush and well trimmed "Darnit," he thinks to himself, "why is does his grass always look so much better." Unbeknownst to him, his neighbor is looking at Mr Smith's orchard thinking "Darnit, why are the trees in his orchard so much better at producing fruit?" This fictional account exemplifies the meaning of the adage "The Grass is Always Greener on the Other Side." It speaks to the fact that it is much easier for us to see what we not have than what we have Mr Smith is busy thinking about how bad his lawn is without realizing that his orchard is probably the best in the neighborhood And his neighbor can only think about how much better his own orchard could be without considering that his lawn is pristine It really is a sad commentary on human nature If people would open their eyes and be content with what they have, there would be so much less conflict and people would be much happier Instead, we spend much of our time trying to attain more and more We must get away from this need People Who Live in Glass Houses Shouldn't Throw Stones One of the favorite pastimes of many people is to criticize others Some spend their entire lives finding fault in the actions of their neighbors, friends, and even strangers Unfortunately, many of the people doing the complaining need look no farther than themselves to find fault This is where the adage "People Who Live in Glass Houses Shouldn't Throw Stones" come from If someone is open to the same type of crticism they are leveling, they shouldn't level it! Consider the case of some of the politicians on Capitol Hill lambasting President Bill Clinton for having an affair When it was discovered that some of those who spoke out most against the president had their own naughty predilections, they suddenly fell silent The "stones" that they had thrown against the president ended up destroying their own lies (their "glass houses") Worse, the embarrassment they suffered was much worse than if they had remained silent on the Clinton issue, because they were shown to be a hypocrite in addition to all of the other terrible things they were! If someone needs correcting for their actions, please try to it in private and only after you have fixed any such problems in your own life That way, there will be much less shattered glass lying around! Speak Softly But Carry a Big Stick This is one of my favorite adages, and I wish I could apply it more to my own life "Speak Softly But Carry a Big Stick" is unique because it rejects the strict passiveness some of the greatest men in history have supported Instead, it supports quietly wielding power most of the time but being prepared to use force-whether figurative or literal-when it is necessary Theodore Roosevelt was a strong proponent of this way of thinking On a more personal level, one of the people I can think of who best exemplifies the adage is Hussein Waljee, a former president of Zeta Beta Tau, Xi Chapter As president, Hussein led quietly most of the time He would talk one-onone with people and execute his plans without too much fanfare When a big issue came up, though, he used his leadership forcefully to help the Brotherhood recover People were surprised by the sudden show of strength from someone who had wielded his strength less publicly before This worked to his advantage, though-people knew he was serious and meant business Some misinterpret this statement to mean that one should be passive most of the time, becoming violent when provoked Instead, it means that you should be restrained and use what power you have quietly You will make more friends and seem less hot-headed and arrogant The big stick, in fact, is something that people should know exists but never see-they should be aware that you have more power than you let on so that they are unwilling to provoke you to utilize it That is one of the most powerful positions to be in And isn't that what life is all about-being in the most powerful position possible without having too many enemies? Don't Look a Gift Horse in the Mouth Suppose you give your best friend a gift certificate for $10 to Borders book store What would your reaction be if their response was "Oh… thanks But it's going to be hard to find something at Borders for $10 Besides, there's not really much at Borders that I would want."? You would probably be rather upset at this rudeness In effect, your friend has just looked a gift horse in the mouth What does that mean? One way of telling how valuable a horse will be is to examine its teeth If the recipient of a horse as a gift first looks at it's teeth, it is obvious that he does not appreciate it for what it was-a gift from a friend Instead he is wondering exactly how it will benefit him In this way, he cheapens the friendship by putting some worldly value on it Of course, this adage is not limited to literal gift-giving Often, there are situations in which a higher power or blind luck can be seen as giving a "gift" to someone Say, for example, that a man runs into the woman he has always been too afraid to talk to and she says "Hi." Let's also say that he then realizes that she is a complete air-head and he shouldn't have wasted all of his time on her Instead of thinking how great it was luck freed him from wasting his time in the future, he may only be able to focus on the amount of time that he did waste This boils down to how hard it is to unconditionally appreciate many of the things that are given to us I warn you to take this adage to heart and try to avoid letting it happen to you-appreciate what you get and you'll find you are a much happier person! (Not to mention that you'll keep the friends or acquaintances that gave you the gift, and may even receive gifts in the future.) The Check is in the Mail This is a relatively modern adage It is unusual in that it is often used in the literal sense That is, whenever someone is pestered to pay a bill they respond that "the check is in the mail." Often, this is a complete lie but they are trying to buy time and postpone facing up to the consequences of not paying the bill In a more general sense, saying this adage can often indicate that what someone has just said is a poor excuse, along the lines of "the dog ate my homework." For example, someone could say that they got to a test late because they were abducted by aliens The professors response is likely to be "Yeah, and the check is in the mail, right?" The worst part of using an excuse like this is that the one making the excuse is trying to pass the blame for their own ineptness on to someone else (in the case of the adage, the "someone else" is the post office) This failure to take responsibility for one's actions seems to be a growing problem in society, and I would like to see that change And I have found the solution, too, but my maid must have displaced it! (Yeah, and my check's in the mail, too.) Don't Call Us, We'll Call You This is an unfortunate adage A stereotypical bad interview, for example, ends with the interviewer telling the applicant "Don't call us, we'll call you." Because it has been repeated so many times, the applicant immediately realizes that they have very little chance of getting what they want They know that, in fact, the interviewer is unlikely to ever call them In addition, the interviewer probably doesn't want the annoyance of hearing from someone who will waste his time The reason it is such an unfortunate adage is that it gives the speaker something to hide behind As a result, they not have to face the uncomfortable situation of an outright rejection It is truly a cowardly thing to What is even worse for the person the adage is spoken to is that they can never be sure if the "hidden meaning" is really there That is, the speaker may be indicating that they are very busy and it is simply easier if they were allowed to initiate the contact This ambiguity leads to even more apprehension and confusion Therefore, try to avoid using this phrase at all costs Instead, explain exactly what you mean If you intend to reject someone, tell them that If you really would prefer to initiate contact because of your schedule or other factors, let the person you are talking to know what those factors are